Women cover half a sky but instead of getting the protocol for that, they go through the violence. While taking the notion of the cycle of violence against women into an account, there is one thing which need attention, in every society somewhere, somehow, a woman is going through this cycle of violence.
However, Pakistan has been identified as the 2nd worst country for women in the annual report on Global Gender Gap Index released by World Economic Forum. According to the theory of the cycle of violence which was proposed by psychologist Lenore Walker in the 1970s, there are four stages in this cycle.
- In the first stage, the beginning of tension building, when the abuser starts getting angry and this creates the communication breakdown. At this stage, the victim feels the need to calm down the abuser and this process triggers anxiety in the victim.
- In the second stage, the phase of tension building transforms into the incident of abuse when the abuser abuses the victim physically, psychologically, and sexually.
- The third stage is making up when a reconciliation process starts with the abuser and he apologizes for his abuse. The abuser blames the victim as the cause of the abuse. He also promises not to repeat the abusive behavior while denying the intensity of his abuse i.e. (it was not as bad as you are making it or taking it and justifies his behavior in one way or the other.)
- The fourth stage is calmness when the victim believes that the abuse is over.
In Pakistan, this theoretical cycle of violence fits accurately where it turned out to be a vicious cycle and the second stage of this cycle harms the life of a woman. The abuse results in the killing of a woman. There are several case studies of past, present, and every other moment that the women get abused and tortured psychologically and physically by intimidating partners, fathers, brothers, and sons.
Women do not go through the abuse at home but also face cyber harassment. According to the annual report of Cyber Harassment Helpline 2021 where 4441 cases were registered out of which 4310 cases were of cyber harassment, 70 cases of domestic violence, 27 cases of physical harassment, 8 cases of sexual harassment, and 15 cases of harassment at workplace were registered.
The major reasons for the cycle of abuse are.
- Socially, women do not enjoy equal economic independence. They are dependent upon the male heads of the family even for their basic needs, there is no popular concept of women’s pocket money in society.
- Married women with children or even without children, usually do not have any support system to end up their abusive relationship.
- The misinterpretation of religion; although religion advocates the rights of women in every field of life but society denies women’s access to all those rights because of a third reason and that is the culture of Pakistan.
- The people who practice the cultural norms have toxified the society and religious teachings too because they do not understand the fact that culture is the offshoot of religion. For instance, (religion gives the right to inheritance to a woman but culture advocates million rupees expansive dowry, religion also gives the right to education, marriage, and security).
- The culture of the society declines the free flow rights of women while the male segment enjoys its free access to the rights, it creates an imbalance of power between the two units of the society. The power on one hand creates a misogynistic and patriarchal culture.
- Furthermore, the class system in Pakistan is also a reason, women are unable to break this cycle of violence, the women who belong to the elite class of 1% are treated as the metaphor for women’s empowerment in society while they do not have any realization of the sensitivity of the issues related to the women. This is the point where structural issues begin.
To deal with the violence against women federal government of Pakistan and the provincial governments have done legislation but when it comes to action it becomes a complicated issue. Many women do not speak up against the violence because they fear stigmatization and victim blaming. The legal procedures are also not easy and affordable for women in Pakistan and result in getting humiliated by police officers at the police stations when it comes to registering the FIRs against the abusers and culprits of violence and the lack of availability of female police officers at police stations.
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Among many such reasons, the main reason for women suffering through violence is that there is no talk about reconciliation, rehabilitation, psychological sessions, and any way to discuss and address issues of male behaviors which lead them to the use of force and abuse of their women including their wives, sisters, daughters, and mothers. So, to counter the cycle of violence against women; both halves of the circle should be taken into the account.
It is true that in this story of violence one is the victim and the other is the abuser but it is not possible to leave one alone to create a further mess and just show sympathy to the victim. Women must learn that there does not exist anything like a first chance. Because any first chance to the abuser is a chance to make the violence-prone human out of her that would not just affect only the woman but her kids and her other relations would also suffer. The behavioral variations in her are byproducts of the abusive treatment she gets from the males around her. To resolve this,
- A temporary separation; as an option can be opted.
- Safe spaces can be created for women.
- The digital legal system by the governments should be introduced for women and girls to get their complains register.
A woman is a maker, creator, and builder of any society. She was born with her rights and society must not be the dictator and suppress her rights, her free access to her rights can keep, make and create a society colorful, magnificent, peaceful, and cooperative. So, to break the cycle of violence against women; a collective and solution-based approach is needed. The aloof and problem-focused approach would create an intolerant society.
